Sunday, July 21, 2013

A time to reap, a time to sow

                                           Yasuharu Takanashi Shiki
         I entered the church with a strong desire to live. That man was going to be the death of me. So I ran. I ran so very far away. The organ played sweetly through the night air, rolling in a sad medley. My feet padded along the floor as I walked in closer to the nun who sat at the big instrument. I hummed along with the melody, almost hearing voices sing along, even though it was my first time stepping in this place and hearing this song. It reminded me of something they would play as a vampire lullaby. It was so lonely and haunting. Tears found their way down my cheeks the closer I got to it. The music seemed to speak to my emotions, telling me that it was okay to cry. The nun stopped playing once I stood behind her. 
"What is it you need, my child?" she asked, turning around to face me. I looked up at her, then down at my shaky hands.
         "I have some confessions," I replied gently. She smiled at me, a understanding grin. 
         "Come with me then, right this way," she bowed. I followed her to the booth. She sat me down before leaving to call a priest over. It didn't take long for me to hear him sit down on opposite side. I took an airy deep breath, as he waited for me patiently. I thought of how I would word it. Should I give my reason? Mother had only brought me to confession once. I remembered what I needed to say in the beginning, but as for the rest, I hadn't the faintest clue on what I should and should not say. 
         "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. It has been ten years since my last confession," I spoke with a fragile tone. I felt like I would break apart right then and there. "I have committed only one act of adultery against the man I was forced into marrying, an arranged marriage." My breath was shaky as I continued. "And now I fear that man is about to commit an awful sin. If he does, I want to ask for his forgiveness, as well," I said softly.
         "I'm afraid that is not how confession works," the priest said to me before adding, "But I will absolve you of your sin if you come to church every day." I had a hard time containing my chuckle. I stood up, thanking the father before heading back to the door. I looked back at the nun who gave me a smile as she played again. I admired it, knowing it would be the first and last time I heard it. The priest didn't know the irony of his words. 
          A week later, a barely sober man walked into that very church. He walked toward the organ which sounded even more sympathetic than it did on the day I walked in. He followed the same path to the nun, who directed him the same way she had led me. 
         The same priest walked to the other side of the booth. The man on the other side babbled, "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. It has been a year since my last confession. I committed a murder last week. It was my wife. She had slept with some other man." The priest's eyes widened.
         "She and God forgive you," the priest spoke, a tear rolling down his face as he did. 

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The wallpaper:

Question: Would you stay with the person you loved even if they were going to kill you? Would you ask for them to be forgive?

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